Empire Strikes Back

What if Star Wars was a Spanish Soap Opera?

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x7tZrBgwAX8&w=853&h=480]

 

I know Steve tends to handle the Star Wars stuff (he may well have something already planned for this week, in which case enjoy your double helping) but I’ve been laughing at this pretty much consistently for about three days and I can no longer hold off the desire to share it.

Empire Strikes Back, transformed into a Spanish soap opera.

May the passion be with you.

D
x

Revenge of the Jedi A-Holes

You can never keep a dark Jedi down. Two utter d@cks meandering around using the Force for something far from the continuance of good and the Jedi way. This one’s for Count Dooku bro!! Clever monkey special effects from the guys who brought you… well … Jedi A-Holes and Ninja Warrior Birthday Party. Freddiew on Youtube!! Maniacal child death at the hands of negligent Jedi gamblers abound. 😉

Attack of the Jedi A-holes

From the a-hole side of the galaxy come the a-hole Jedi, a nefarious gang of force pumped douche bags who use the force in ways that Yoda never thought of. But Master Windu might’ve. And Darth Vader definitely did. When not slicing up post boxes in pleasant neighbourhood streets, the Jedi a-holes like nothing more than being douches at the mall, or perhaps the beach. And if that weren’t enough – here’s the making of Jedi A-holes and how to do Lightsabres (a trick we already know but haven’t had a chance to do here at BTB)!! Well it’s almost Christmas isn’t it.

MORE JEDI A-HOLES SOON!!

Lost Jedi: The Dark Side

Lord of the Sith Darth Vader - who pursues the last of the Lost Jedi


Lord of the Sith Darth Sidious


Moff Yung - Commander of the Imperial Fleet decimated by Govija Kaoli and Mooba Choobi


The new Empire seeks to decimate and hound the remaining Jedi. But foremost, and with the greatest threat to Emperor Palpatine’s power gone or under his own command it focusses now more on expansion and anchoring its control over the galaxy. Where ever possible the Jedi will attempt to stop this from happening. Jedi Master Ca De Nas holds the controlled Anakin Skywalker in place long enough for some Jedi to escape the Jedi Temple on Coruscant, Master Govija Kaoli and Padawan Mooba Choobi annihalate Star Destroyers in their pursuit to redress the balance, fighting alongside the remaining Separatist forces. Jedi Master Jordo Pash draws Vader into conflict on a barren Moon, far from innocent bystanders for a final showdown. Although the Sith and their cohorts believe they have effectively won, while one single Jedi remains in the galaxy, hope is not lost. So there.

A long time ago, in a Galaxy far, far away….: BTB enters the Star Wars Universe!!

Welcome to the new Beyond the Bunker Star Wars zone. Every Wednesday there will be something from the enormously expansive Star Wars Universe. Be it from the core films I-III or the classic IV-VI, the expanded universe – Clone Wars, Droids, Ewoks – even the Holiday Special if we can find it. And the funnies too.

Interspersed among the existing material will be my little fanboy creation. The Lost Jedi was a title I developed in a fanboy fever while serving as a Jedi/Rebel Trooper at the Star Wars Exhibition in London. Working with a host of exceptional actors, performers, fight trainers and technicians we performed 8 or more Jedi Schools in the central chamber of County Hall, Westminster, in the heart of London. Still the greatest job I’ve ever done – I spent the day training younglings to fight like a Jedi, die like a Rebel Trooper. In my time there, surrounded by the sights and sounds of Lucas and John Williams it was difficult not to be completely overwhelmed by it all.

In a central chamber lay the shining corvette, spitfiresque frame of a Naboo Fighter. To the side of that Wookee costumes and a speeder like that which was ridden by the Skywalkers on Endor. In a darkened room at the back of the exhibition stood a solitary figure. A 7 foot tall goliath in a glass cage. Darth Vader’s suit loomed in the darkness and captured everyone’s imagination that entered. There was never noise in that room, only an eerie and awed hush as tourists stood and basked in a character that is now utterly synonomous with evil and tragedy. And cool.

Expanding so much further beyond mere cinema, Star Wars is an ideology nowadays. A universe that has influenced popular and scientific culture. Star Wars, perhaps more than any other cultural phenomenon of the late twentieth century has the capacity to move into historical lore and take a place in mythology. At its most challenging and insistent, the material developed by the films (even with the less impressive prequels) the cultural and ideological impact of Star Wars gives us insight into the breeding of myths of Gods and Monsters from ancient times. A modern day Odyssey perhaps, it shows us the way religious texts expand and are embraced, whether originally intended by their creators or not. If anything it shows how once a cultural phenomenon is formed it can be expanded upon and used to generate enormous monies for the creator.

Naboo N1-Fighter, parked in landing bay 1, Westminster, 2007

Offering ideologies, an alternative global religion (?!), expansion in gaming, cinema and digital technologies – both in sound and light (and magic), universal themes and characters and having been embraced by effectively billions globally noone should underestimate the width of influence a Dark Lord of the Sith might have.

Jedis unite. For Star Wars has arrived on Beyond the Bunker. Featuring articles, fan films, reviews and the Lost Jedi fan material we are planning to fill the next six months with insight and delight associated with the Star Wars Universe. I’ve got a bad feeling about this….

Next Week: The Lost Jedi. Part One.